


Right Where We Are

by DizzyRedhead



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Avengers Tower, Because of Reasons, Christmas, Everybody Lives, Feelstide 2015, Fluff, Get Together, JARVIS is a matchmaker, M/M, Not Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Compliant, Not Avengers: Age of Ultron (Movie) Compliant, Not Canon Compliant, Secret Santa
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-16
Updated: 2015-12-16
Packaged: 2018-05-07 00:34:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,574
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5436791
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DizzyRedhead/pseuds/DizzyRedhead
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tony decides to have a Secret Santa for all the people living in Avenger's Tower. When Clint and Phil have to buy presents for each other, will they take the chance to reach for what they want? Or will they chicken out (despite Pepper and Natasha's best efforts)?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Set in a random AU where nobody dies, and Phil, Wanda, and Pietro are all living in the Tower, along with Jane, Darcy, and Betty. Because reasons.
> 
> Big thanks to [Aenaria](http://archiveofourown.org/users/Aenaria/pseuds/Aenaria) for looking at this and helping me get unstuck and to [MsSunfire](http://mssunfire.tumblr.com/) for the last-minute beta!!!
> 
> The complete fic is in Chapter 1, Chapter 2 will be deleted scenes, including all of the emails that JARVIS sent out.
> 
> Title from [Thinking Out Loud by Ed Sheeran](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lp-EO5I60KA)

**TO: Avengers Tower Residents <tower.residents.list@avengersassemble.com>**

**FROM: Tony Stark <iron.man@avengersassemble.com>**

**RE: Secret Santa**

**Okay, kids, we’re gonna do a Secret Santa for teambuilding and stuff, since it’s our first Christmas in the tower. Jarvis has a completely randomized list of who's matched with who (well, pseudorandomized, I told him people aren't allowed to buy presents for the people they're sleeping with or related to, and anyway, true randomization is hard and doesn’t really seem random) and he'll be sending you emails with your assignments. To make it fair, you'll all be receiving delivery of a credit card with a $5,000 spending limit. Any questions, take 'em up with the AI.**

**Sincerely,**

**Your benevolent host**

  
“Five thousand dollars is ridiculous, Tony,” Pepper said calmly as she came into the workshop.

“I know, but I didn’t think you’d let me do fifty,” Tony said, turning away from his workbench  and flipping his welding mask up.

She sighed. “What could anyone in the Tower possibly want or need in the five- to fifty-thousand-dollar range that you haven’t already provided for them?”

“Well…” His voice trailed off. “You may have a point,” he admitted.

“Normal people, and I realize this is a difficult concept for you,” Pepper said, smiling fondly, “would probably set a spending limit somewhere between $50 and $100.”

“Fine,” Tony sighed dramatically. “JARVIS, send a correction email. Happy, O CEO of my heart?”

“Thrilled,” she said. “Now we need to talk about the R&D budget…”

 

**TO: Avengers Tower Residents <tower.residents.list@avengersassemble.com>**

**FROM: JARVIS <jarvis@avengersassemble.com>**

**RE: Secret Santa Correction**

**Mr. Stark has asked me to inform you that the price limit for gifts is actually $75. Assignments will be forthcoming shortly and will be sent individually.**

**Sincerely,**

**JARVIS**

* * *

**TO: Clint Barton <legolas@avengersassemble.com>**

**FROM: JARVIS <jarvis@avengersassemble.com>**

**RE Secret Santa Assignment**  

**Agent Barton,**

**You will be giving a present to Agent Coulson. Please let me know if I can be of any assistance, including surveillance.**

**Sincerely,**

**JARVIS**

  


“Oh, shit,” Clint said softly.

Natasha quirked an eyebrow at him from the opposite corner of the common room couch, and he wordlessly handed over the tablet. She read in silence for a few seconds, then lowered the tablet to her lap and looked back up at him with visible impatience.

“I can’t,” he said, shaking his head. “How am I supposed to--”

“To buy a present for someone you’ve known for more than fifteen years?” Natasha interrupted. “For the one person in the Tower that you know better than anyone else? For the man you’ve been pining after for as long as I’ve known you?”

Clint buried his face in his hands. “He’s going to know. He’s like a fucking ninja, Nat. If I buy him a present, he’ll know.”

“Good,” she said ruthlessly. “It’s about fucking time. I’m tired of watching you torture yourself with this, Clint. Make a move. He might surprise you, but either way, you’ll know.”

“Yeah,” he said reluctantly. “I guess.”

She stood up to leave the room, dropping the tablet back in his lap. “If you chicken out, I swear to Thor I will duct-tape you two together naked in a closet until you talk to him.”

Once Natasha had left the room, Jarvis made the little pinging noise that he used in place of clearing his throat. “If I might offer some suggestions, Agent Barton?”

Clint sagged back onto the couch. “You might as well,” he said fatalistically.

* * *

**TO: Phil Coulson <agent@avengersassemble.com>**

**FROM: JARVIS <jarvis@avengersassemble.com>**

**RE Secret Santa Assignment**

**Agent Coulson,**

**You will be giving a present to Agent Barton. Please let me know if you need any measurements, bow or arrow specs, etc.**

**Sincerely,**

**JARVIS**

 

Phil finished reading the email, reached for his phone without taking his eyes off the computer screen, and speed-dialed Pepper.

“Is Tony matchmaking?” he demanded when she answered the phone.

“Hello, Phil,” she said pleasantly. “How nice to hear from you. Lovely weather we’ve been having lately, isn’t it?”

He sighed. “I’m sorry. Hello, Pepper. Is Tony matchmaking?”

“Not that I’m aware of,” she said. “Any particular reason why you’d be asking that now? Does this have something to do with the Secret Santa?”

“Are _you_ matchmaking?” he asked suspiciously.

He could hear Pepper’s smile, the one that said “I eat corporate sharks for breakfast without breaking a sweat” even over the phone. “Phil, if I was matchmaking, you and Clint would be married by now.”

“Okay,” he said hastily, because the idea of Pepper Potts arranging his love life, while it had some appeal, was mostly infinitely terrifying. “Okay. I can do this.”

“Yes, you can,” Pepper agreed. “And Phil?”

“Yes?”

“If you don’t make a move soon, I _will_ be matchmaking. And Natasha will help.”

Phil ended the call and set his phone down on his desk with infinite care. “Fuck.”

* * *

“Maybe I could get him a tie?” Clint said, jumping over Natasha’s leg sweep. She took advantage of his distraction to take him down to the mat, pinning him with one arm twisted up behind him and her knee in the small of his back.

“Listen carefully,” Natasha said. “If you just buy him a tie, I will hogtie you with it and leave you on his doorstep. For your own good. Do you understand?”

Clint nodded against the mat.

She waited for a bit and then released him. “You know him, Clint,” she said gently. “You can do this.”

“Yeah, yeah,” he said, dragging himself to his feet. “It’ll be fine.”

* * *

Phil waited at the workshop door for Tony (or JARVIS, really) to let him in, since it seemed impolite to barge in when he was asking for a favor. He only had to stand there for a few minutes before the doors slid open to allow him entry.

“Agent!” Tony said, not looking up from the holographic display he was manipulating. “What brings you to my playground?”

“Well, I know you have the specs for Clint’s bow and quiver--” Phil started, but Tony was already shaking his head.

“No can do, sorry. Pepper told me I have to stay out of this one. Besides,” he smirked over his shoulder at Phil, “you couldn’t afford me on your budget.”

Phil concentrated on keeping his blandest facial expression while counting backwards from ten in Estonian. “In that case,” he said mildly, “I’ll let you get back to your work.”

“Good luck!” Tony called behind him.

* * *

It was Christmas morning, and for once, there was no alien invasion or other crisis that would require the presence of the Avengers. The Tower residents had gathered in the penthouse, and Tony, wearing a Santa hat with Christmas lights in the shape of arc reactors strung around it, clapped his hands to get their attention.

“Let’s get started! One at a time, so we can all admire each other’s cleverness.” He retrieved a box from under the tree and handed it to Natasha, who eyed him impassively before turning it over and starting to unwrap the red and gold paper.

Clint squeezed his coffee mug and took another sip, trying not to freak out, as Nat set the wrapping paper aside and opened the box to reveal...yarn. Really pretty yarn, but still.

“That one’s silk and that one’s cashmere,” Tony babbled. “They’re handpainted, but if you don’t like the colors we can return them--”

“They’re lovely, Tony,” Natasha said sincerely, stroking her fingertips over the yarn. “Thank you.”

Tony sagged back into his seat, and Nat reluctantly set aside the yarn to stand up from the couch and select a slim package wrapped in silver striped paper from under the tree. She crossed the living room to hand it to Pietro, where he was sitting at Wanda’s feet. “Merry Christmas,” she said quietly, moving back to the couch as Pietro started to shred the wrapping paper.

His froze when he opened the box and saw the picture frame inside, still in a way he almost never was. “How…”

“Tony helped,” Nat said, tipping her head toward him in acknowledgement. “And we checked with Wanda to be sure we got the colors right.”

Pietro reached up toward his sister without looking and she took his hand, both of them looking at the picture with eyes shiny with unshed tears. “Thank you,” he told Natasha after clearing his throat, and Wanda nodded her agreement

After staring at the picture for a few moments more, Pietro set it carefully aside and pulled the biggest, most haphazardly wrapped package out from under the tree and carried it over to where Bruce sat in the armchair closest to the fire, dropping it in his lap with a smirk before returning to his seat on the floor in front of Wanda’s chair.

“Thanks,” Bruce said, touching the package hesitantly. When it didn’t move, he started unwrapping it methodically. He paused when he got about halfway down, blinking at the large purple teddy bear in confusion.

“It’s not for you,” Pietro told him. “It’s for the big guy. He really wanted one when we were taking care of the the robot crabs in that mall last month. Your present is underneath.”

Bruce’s face softened. “Thanks,” he said, more sincerely, fishing a tin of the loose-leaf tea he preferred out of the bottom of the package.

Clint was getting more and more anxious as the morning wore on, sneaking glances at Phil where he sat chatting easily with Pepper, sipping his coffee and smiling his real smile, not just the blandly impersonal one he used at work.

Clint lost track of who was giving gifts and what they were doing or saying, instead imagining all the ways that this could go wrong and wishing he’d just gotten Phil a tie, no matter what Natasha had threatened. At least I know he likes ties, he thought glumly, trying not to look at the envelope he’d snuck under the tree, looking kind of pathetic among the brightly wrapped presents.

Finally the hubbub died down, and Tony looked up from where he and Bruce and Jane had their heads together, probably sciencing something up. “Is that everybody, J?”

“Agents Barton and Coulson have not given or received gifts yet,” Jarvis’ said, and it took all of Clint’s training not to twitch. He stood and walked toward the tree, seeing Phil do the same out of the corner of his eye. The walk seemed to take forever, seconds stretching like minutes, and he had plenty of time to notice that the only other present under the tree was a reasonable-sized box, making his envelope look even smaller and sadder.

He picked up the envelope and held it for a moment, feeling the silence of the room and the eyes on them like a physical weight. He turned toward Phil, and his eyes lifted toward Phil’s without him consciously willing it, drawn to him with an almost magnetic pull.

Clint had thought he knew all of Phil’s expressions, the real ones and the ones he let the world see. But this...this was new. Phil looked...uncertain.

“Merry Christmas, Clint,” he said softly, holding out the box. Clint took it in one hand and offered the envelope in return, a sensation in his stomach that he’d only ever felt when he was trying to cheat gravity (and failing, usually).

“Merry Christmas,” he said in return, sitting down on the floor there by the tree and tearing into the wrapping paper on his gift. He saw Phil sink down next to him, but he couldn’t bring himself to look, to see if Phil had opened the envelope.

He tossed the balled-up wrapping paper impatiently in the direction of the trash can Pepper had made sure to have on hand and opened the box.

“Well, come on, Barton,” Tony heckled impatiently. “Let’s see--owwww!”

Clint shot Pepper a grateful glance and pulled out a six-pack of his favorite beer and a Blu-Ray copy of Blade Runner (not the director’s cut, of course, because Phil knew him better than that).

“Blade Runner?” Tony complained. “And not even the director’s cut?”

“It’s my favorite,” Clint said absently, looking back into the box. Down at the very bottom was an envelope, which Clint instinctively opened inside the box, even though no one who wasn’t him should be able to read anything from where the team was sitting.

Inside the envelope was a gift certificate for Five Guys and a note:

_I know it’s no In-N-Out, but would you like to get some burgers and watch a movie with me? My place or yours._

Clint stared at the note in disbelief for a minute, and it fluttered out of his hands to land in the bottom of the box, upside down, revealing the words on the other side:

_Yes, like a date._

He felt an incredulous smile spreading across his face and looked up to meet Phil’s eyes. “Yeah,” he said softly. “That sounds good.”

“Good,” Phil repeated, his own smile widening and his shoulders slumping almost imperceptibly. “I guess I should probably open this, huh?” he added, looking down at the envelope in his hands.

“Probably,” Clint said, all of his apprehension floating away on the bubbling tide of happiness rising in his chest.

Phil ripped the envelope open neatly and pulled out the suit-and-tie greeting card that Clint had spent laborious hours teaching himself how to make. The insane number of times he’d had to watch the YouTube tutorial were all worth it when Phil smiled at him, the corners of his eyes crinkling, and opened the card with careful fingers

Phil deftly caught the tickets as they fell out of the card, but he ignored them in favor of reading the message inside.

“All right, Coulson,” Tony called from the bar. “Whatcha got?”

“Two tickets to the Bond Villains exhibit at the International Spy Museum,” Phil answered calmly.

“Oh, cool,” Tony said, adding a little more rum to his eggnog. “Two tickets, huh? Can I go?”

Phil shook his head, carefully sliding the card and the tickets back into the envelope. “Sorry, Tony. I think I’m going to take Clint.”

“Sure, play favorites,” Tony grumbled. “Well, if that’s all the presents, it’s time for brunch! Food’s in the kitchen, folks, let’s go!!!”

Clint put his movie and beer back into the box before getting to his feet and offering Phil a hand up.

Phil didn’t let go of his hand until they were done with brunch.


	2. Deleted Scenes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This fic really fought me, and I really enjoyed writing the emails that JARVIS sent out, so here they are, along with some of the scenes that didn't really advance the plot.

**TO: Steve Rogers <capsicle@avengersassemble.com>**

**FROM: JARVIS <jarvis@avengersassemble.com>**

**RE: Secret Santa Assignment**

** Captain, **

** You will be giving a present to Mr. Stark. You have my deepest sympathies, and if I can be of any assistance, please don't hesitate to ask. Also, Ms. Potts has said she will be happy to assist you if needed. **

** Sincerely, **

** JARVIS **

 

"Oh, fuck me sideways," Steve sighed from where he sat at the kitchen table.

"What's up?" Darcy asked, draping herself over his bare shoulder so she could see the tablet screen, Steve's t-shirt riding up dangerously high on her naked thighs. "Ohhhhh. That's gonna be rough. What do you buy for the man who has everything and all the impulse control of a five-year-old on a sugar rush?"

"Exactly," he said, setting the tablet down on the table with exaggerated care.

She kissed his cheek. "It'll be okay. Talk to Pepper. She wouldn't offer if she didn't mean it."

Steve tugged her into his lap. "I ever tell you you're pretty smart?"

"You might've mentioned it once or twice..." Darcy said mock-doubtfully.

He kissed her, long, luxuriant kisses that had her melting into him. "Pretty," he said between kisses. "Smart." Another kiss. "How'd I get lucky enough to find you?"

"You didn't," Darcy said, squirming a little as he trailed kisses down her neck, his stubble scratching lightly at her skin. "I--ah--I found you. And I'm keeping you."

"Okay," Steve said agreeably. "You know, that's my shirt you're wearing."

"So it is," Darcy said, shivering as his hands slid under the hem. "I guess you want it back?"

The shirt landed on the floor. "Maybe later," he said, and kissed her again.

* * *

_TO: Darcy Lewis <i.tased.thor@avengersassemble.com>_

_FROM: JARVIS <jarvis@avengersassemble.com>_

_RE Secret Santa Assignment_

_ Miss Lewis, _

_ You will be giving a present to Dr. Ross. Please feel free to let me know if you require any assistance, although I'm certain you are up to the challenge. _

_ Sincerely, _

_ JARVIS _

 

Darcy plopped down onto the couch in the suite she shared with Steve and cracked her neck. “All right, JARVIS, it’s time to shop.”

“I have every confidence in you, Miss Lewis,” the AI said, bringing up the online shopping display.

* * *

**TO: Bucky Barnes <grumpy.bear@avengersassemble.com>**

**FROM: JARVIS <jarvis@avengersassemble.com>**

**RE Secret Santa Assignment**

** Sergeant Barnes, **

** You will be giving a present to Prince Thor. Please feel free to let me know if you require any assistance. I believe Dr. Foster and Miss Lewis could also be of help, if you so desire. **

** Sincerely, **

** JARVIS **

 

"And you're sure he'll like ‘em?" Bucky asked Darcy, eyeing the wall display doubtfully.

“Are you kidding? Thor collects every single Avengers t-shirt he can find.  [The Avengers as cats](http://www.teefury.com/catvengers) , plus  [cat Nick Fury](http://www.teefury.com/nick-furry) ?” Darcy dropped her voice to an approximation of Thor’s booming baritone. “‘My friends! Behold these adorable animals! Are they not a perfect representation of our might?’”

Bucky nodded. “Okay, JARVIS, go ahead and order them.”

“And the  [meow-meow one](http://www.teefury.com/behold-the-mighty-meow-meow) for me, J,” Darcy added.

* * *

** TO: Sam Wilson <birdbrain@avengersassemble.com> **

**FROM: JARVIS <jarvis@avengersassemble.com>**

**RE Secret Santa Assignment**

** Staff Sergeant Wilson, **

** You will be giving a present to Miss Potts. Please feel free to let me know if your require any assistance; I have Miss Potts' sizes and color and brand preferences on file. **

** Sincerely, **

** JARVIS **

* * *

** TO: Tony Stark <iron.man@avengersassemble.com> **

**FROM: JARVIS <jarvis@avengersassemble.com>**

**RE Secret Santa Assignment**

** Sir, **

** You will be giving a present to Agent Romanoff. May I suggest that you ask for help from Miss Potts, Miss Lewis, Dr. Foster, Agent Barton, Captain Rogers, or any other member of the team, really, since you have expressed a desire to not be stabbed in the neck again? Sergeant Barnes is remarkably stable at the moment, but I believe it would be wisest not to test either of them. **

* * *

** TO: Pepper Potts <ceo@avengersassemble.com> **

**FROM: JARVIS <jarvis@avengersassemble.com>**

**RE Secret Santa Assignment**

** Miss Potts, **

** You will be giving a present to Miss Maximoff. I do not believe that you will require any assistance, but please let me know if I can help with the arrangements in any way. **

** Sincerely, **

** JARVIS **

* * *

** TO: James Rhodes <war.machine.rox@avengersassemble.com> **

**FROM: JARVIS <jarvis@avengersassemble.com>**

**RE Secret Santa Assignment**

** Colonel Rhodes, **

** You will be giving a present to Miss Lewis. Please let me know if I can be of any assistance (also, Mr. Stark has already redesigned her taser). **

** Sincerely, **

** JARVIS **

* * *

** TO: Natasha Romanoff <natalie.rushman@avengersassemble.com> **

**FROM: JARVIS <jarvis@avengersassemble.com>**

**RE Secret Santa Assignment**

** Agent Romanoff, **

** You will be giving a present to Mr. Maximoff. Dr. Banner has requested that he not receive anything that will encourage him to strain his wounds, but I feel confident you are already aware of this. **

** Sincerely, **

** JARVIS **

* * *

** TO: Bruce Banner <big.green@avengersassemble.com> **

**FROM: JARVIS <jarvis@avengersassemble.com>**

**RE Secret Santa Assignment**

** Dr. Banner, **

** You will be giving a present to Staff Sergeant Wilson. I would like to remind you at this time that the virtual shopping options available to Tower residents eliminate the need to venture out into the holiday shopping madhouse. **

** Sincerely, **

** JARVIS **

* * *

** TO: Betty Ross <dr.ross@avengers.assemble.com> **

**FROM: JARVIS <jarvis@avengersassemble.com>**

**RE Secret Santa Assignment**

** Dr. Ross, **

** You will be giving a present to Dr. Foster. I believe there are several helpfully marked-up scientific supply catalogs that just happen to be sitting on the counter in the common room. Please let me know should you require any further assistance. **

** Sincerely, **

** JARVIS **

* * *

** TO: Jane Foster <dr.foster@avengersassemble.com> **

**FROM: JARVIS <jarvis@avengersassemble.com>**

**RE Secret Santa Assignment**

** Dr. Foster, **

** You will be giving a present to Colonel Rhodes. Please let me know should you require any assistance. I recommend not mentioning it to Mr. Stark, but Ms. Potts has known Colonel Rhodes for nearly as long and is much better at keeping secrets. **

** Sincerely, **

** JARVIS **

* * *

** TO: Thor <captain.hammer@avengersassemble.com> **

**FROM: JARVIS <jarvis@avengersassemble.com>**

**RE Secret Santa Assignment**

** Prince Thor, **

** You will be giving a present to Sergeant Barnes. Captain Rogers has requested that it not involve any loud noises, as those can still be problematic for the Sergeant. I believe he has several possible suggestions if you should wish to speak to him. **

** Sincerely, **

** JARVIS **

* * *

** TO: Wanda Maximoff <red.handed@avengersassemble.com> **

**FROM: JARVIS <jarvis@avengersassemble.com>**

**RE Secret Santa Assignment**

** Miss Maximoff, **

** You will be giving a present to Captain Rogers. I will leave the matter in your capable hands. **

** Sincerely, **

** JARVIS **

* * *

** TO: Pietro Maximoff <speed.racer@avengersassemble.com> **

**FROM: JARVIS <jarvis@avengersassemble.com>**

**RE Secret Santa Assignment**

**Mr. Maximoff,**

**You will be giving a present to Dr. Banner. I ask you to consider the fact that we have only just finished renovations on the tower when selecting your gift.**

**Sincerely,**

**JARVIS**

 


End file.
